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Mind your words

We often say words we don’t mean or are clumsy, thoughtless in how we respond to someone, especially if the conversation is an emotional one and you feel in some way you threatened.

We let people “off the hook”, because that’s how they always react or that’s just the way  they are.

Most family arguments are caused through a breakdown in communication and words being thrown at each other through hurt and frustration. 

Our limbic (emotional), brain takes over the conversation, protecting our beliefs and areas of our life we feel threatened in.

Most of the time we give emotional reactions when we feel out of control.

A way to improve our reactive words are to be more self aware. Recognise when you become emotional, what does it feel like, what reaction is your body giving.

Before firing off an email save it in drafts or send it to a trusted friend.

If someone has said or done an action you feel hurt by, write a letter pouring out all your emotion and then speak to them when you are back in control.

Check your understanding of what they are saying as you might not have understood them correctly.

Walk away, shout in your room, phone someone you can off load on.

Words are powerful and once you have said them you can’t take them back even if you have any to.

Look at the relationships around you and listen for the conversations - remember you are not listening to be right, you are listening to understand 😁.

Have a great day

Nicky

The Communication Coach

Riseley, Bedford MK44, UK

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