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The Gift of Time

I spoke to an old friend of mine yesterday. We have known each other since we were late teens. It's one of those relationships whereby we might not talk for a year but it has no impact on our relationship. She has had a tough time recently - husband left her, children, full time work, balancing everything and everyone. Not an uncommon story in today's world. She was her normal bright and lovely self. Asking about me and my world, making me feel like an important person. I noticed whenever I asked a question it was met with a; "Oh you know, the kids are doing well, it's all great", and switching the conversation back to me. I felt she was avoiding talking about her world. We carried on chatti

It's Good to Talk

I have been reading about the interview with Lady Gaga and Prince William this week and watching the video. It's great to see leaders and people of influence taking responsibility for talking about mental health. I have had the real honour of talking to many people with mental health illness. Most of you will know of my friends at Hear Us, a charity for those with mental health illness providing training and breaking down barriers to conversation. Every time I see them they inspire me to keep making a difference. I have also had the privilege of talking to people in crisis, those who have reached a point where they don't want to carry on as they can't see through the pain anymore. These peop

How Questions Can Be A Barrier To Communication

Picture the scene, your friend has just come back from holiday and you are speaking to them on the phone. The conversation goes a little like this; You: "Hi how are you?" Them: "Great thanks we have just got back from holiday". Let's pause the conversation there. It's now your turn in the conversation. What are you likely to say? I am guessing you have a question about the holiday like, "How was it?, or "Where did you go?". You can probably think of lots of other questions of your own. The conversation continues; You: "Where did you go?" Them: " Greece, it was lovely". Great - hang on though. Let's rewind, we asked a question based on what we wanted to know. What if there is another way for

Emotional Conversations

This week is flying by and spring is definitely here. I am lucky enough to live in a lovely little village where you notice the change of the seasons and the different colours each season brings. The weekend was beautiful and sunny and Monday seemed to come round far too quickly. Back in the office we have been talking about our weekends and inevitably sharing our thoughts, feelings and some of the conversations we had. It's funny when you get a group of people who study conversations and negotiations and how people work. We all understand the emotional and logical brain but we can't stop our own emotional conversations. One was a family disagreement, one was a change in weekend plans, one

 

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