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Self talk and the words we use.

My last video talked about persuasion and what I believe is the missing factor. What about self persuasion, changing habits and self talk? How many times do we use the word "I can't" or "I should" or "I need to". These words tell the world about ourselves. "I can't" puts us into a negative state of frustration and causes an extra block to the challenge we already have. Using "how can I" helps the brain to start searching for an answer. The answer is already there we just are unclear of what it is at the moment. "I need to" is very different from "I want to". I need to is about the expectation of others where as I want to is about what we want. For example "I need to lose weight". Okay but what do you want to do. "I want to get into my jeans again". Ah so now we have the want and we can link this in to the need. "I should have done......" oh the beauty of hindsight!!!! Change the sentence to "I could do ......" and you start to take back control of what you can change. When you say to someone "you should do .......", that's all about you and what you would do in the situation not what is necessarily best for them. Change it to "you could do....." and the choice is their own and they have control. I will cover this in a more in depth video over the next few day. Let me know what you would like me to write/talk about to help you with any areas of communication you have. Finally in the words of Yoda: 

The Communication Coach

Riseley, Bedford MK44, UK

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